Cleaning Out My Closet
by Paris Marriott
Summary: Songfic----Mikey remembers his relationship with his mom--WARNING CURSING AND SOME VIOLENCE!


A/N: OK, before I get pelted with rotten tomatoes by every Eminem hater out there, I am writing this because I heard the song while watching Bonky fever and this idea somehow came to me and I have no clue why. But it has been bugging me all day so here you are! Keep in mind this deals with issues such as violence and has strong language, which is why it is rated R! Mikey is also very, very VERY out of character!

** Have you ever been hated or discriminated against? I have, I've been **

**protested and demonstrated against**

**Picket signs for my wicked rhymes. Look at the times. Sick is the mind **

**of the motha fuckin' kid that's behind**

** all this commotion. Emotions run deep as ocean's explodin.' Tempers **

**flaring from parents, just blow 'em off and keep goin.'**

**Not takin 'nothin' from no one, give 'em hell long as I'm breathin.' Keep **

**kickin' ass in the mornin,' an' takin' names in the evening.**

** Leavem with a taste as sour as vinegar in they mouth. See, they can **

**trigger me but they never figure me out**

**Look at me now, I bet ya probably sick of me now. Ain't you mama, **

**I'ma make you look so ridiculous now.**

All his life, Mikey Blumburg had been treated badly and had various rumors spread about him because of his carefree poetic nature. It had started in elementary school, when he had discovered that he was the only boy in his ballet class. People would whisper about him behind his back, saying stuff that was untrue and caused him to cry alone in his room every night, even though he constantly hid his hurt under a sunny positive exterior. The only reason he acted the way he did back then was because that was how his mother expected him to act---she didn't want him to be involved in sports---she was too afraid her little Ôlamb chop' would get hurt and felt that other Ômanly' activities such as fixing cars was inappropriate for someone as sweet and delicate as her little Mikey. 

But all of that changed once Mikey turned sixteen. He was sick of being treated like crap, so he had decided to change his image. Gone was the sweet innocent boy who used to try and recite poetry to Ashley A. that Mikey was replaced with a rougher more abusive person, one who often got into fights and vandalized school property. He had beaten Skeenz's detention record and made Gellman look like a perfect gentleman. Nobody could understand the change in Mikey and often blamed his mother for driving him to such behavior. Pretty soon parents stopped allowing their kids to hang out or date him, and tried everything in their power to get him out of the school, because they feared his behavior would have a negative effect on the students. 

**I'm sorry, Mama. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you **

**cry, but tonight I'm cleanin' out my closet.**

**I'm sorry, Mama. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you **

**cry, but tonight I'm cleanin' out my closet.**

**I got some skeletons in my closet and I don't know if no one knows it. **

**So before they thrown me inside my coffin and close it,**

**I'ma expose it. I'll take you back to 73 before I ever had a multi-platinum **

**sellin' CD. I was a baby, maybe I was just a couple of months, My **

**father must have had his panties up in a bunch, **

** cuz he split. I wonder if he even kissed me goodbye. No, I don't on **

**second thought, I just fuckin' wished he would die. **

Things went from bad to worse when Mikey had turned nineteen and was put in jail for drug dealing and possession of an unauthorized weapon. He never forgot the look of shame and sadness on his mother's face when she had come to visit him in jail. She tried to act like she had no idea where she had gone wrong, but Mikey knew that she was to blame for his dramatic change in behavior. He had screamed at her, saying by sheltering him all of his life, she had caused him to act out in ways unimaginable for her. He accused her of driving his father out of his life when he was a baby, saying that her crazy, possessive behavior was the real reason he had left, not because he had no desire to be a father. Mikey had spent a better part of his childhood wondering what he had done wrong to force his father out of his life and if he had actually loved him. It wasn't until his teen years when his father had visited him that he realized that he didn't need this man in his life claimed that he was dead to him and never to contact him again. During this visit, Mikey's mom had cried, saying how sorry she was for ruining his life and failing him, but Mikey would have none of it and continued to rant on about how his mother ultimately destroyed him. 

**Look at Hailie and I couldn't picture leavin' her side. Even if I hated **

**Kim, I grit my teeth and I'd try **

** to make it work with her at least for Hailie's sake. I maybe made some **

**mistakes but I'm only human. But I'm man enough to face them today.**

** What I did was stupid, no doubt it was dumb, but the smartest shit I did **

**was take them bullets out of that gun.**

**Cuz id'a killed 'em, shit I would have shot Kim an' him both. It's my life, **

**I'd like to welcome y'all to The Eminem Show.**

Five years later, after Mikey had gotten out of jail, he had married an old childhood friend Kristen Kurst (Kurst the Worst) after he had gotten her pregnant with their daughter Amanda. After she was born, Mikey had tried to straighten his life out and be a good father, but he and Kurst had a horrible relationship. They would often end up in fights that led to violence, sometimes Mikey would punch or hit her, and one time he had even pulled a gun on her, telling her that she was the female version of his father, and that they both deserved to die for making his life a living hell. Heck, he even told her his mother deserved to die for all the shit she had put him through. If little Amanda hadn't walked into the room, Mikey had no idea what he would have ended up doing, so he took the bullets out of the gun and tried his best to make things work with his wife and he tried to turn his life around so that his daughter could have the childhood and life he never got to have. 

**I'm sorry, Mama. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you **

**cry, but tonight I'm cleanin' out my closet.**

**I'm sorry, Mama. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you **

**cry, but tonight I'm cleanin' out my closet.**

**Now I would never dis my own mama just to get recognition. Take a **

**second to listen for you think this record is dissin'**

**But put yourself in my position. Just try to envision witnessin' your **

**Mama poppin' prescription pills in the kitchen, bitchin' that someone's **

**always goin' through her purse and shits missin'. Going through public **

**housing systems, victim of Munchausen's syndrome.**

Even though he had tried to fix his life, Mikey still found himself in trouble with the law, often ending up in jail for crimes that he had claimed his mother drove him to commit. Each time he was brought in, his mother would come and visit him, always crying and asking him why he ended up the way he did. And each time, he would yell back that she was to blame, by forcing him into dance and other feminine activities, causing people to think he was gay for over half his life and for him to be taunted and beaten up at school. His mom had yelled back, saying that he was the creator of his own destiny and that she had only guided him to the kind of life that she thought was appropriate for him. Mikey told her to put herself in his shoes so she could see what it was like to grow up being him, in hopes that she would finally realized that she was to blame for everything that had gone wrong in his life. 

** My whole life I was made to believe I was sick when I wasn't 'til I grew **

**up, now I blew up. It makes you sick to ya stomach,**

** doesn't it? Wasn't it the reason you made that CD for me, Ma? So you **

**could try to justify the way you treated me, Ma?**

**But guess what, yer gettin' older now and it's cold when your lonely. An' **

**Nathan's getting' up so quick, he's gonna know that your phoney.**

** And Hailie's getting' so big now, you should see her, she's beautiful. But **

**you'll never see her, she won't even be at your funeral.**

** See what hurts me the most is you won't admit you was wrong. Bitch, **

**do ya song. Keep tellin' yourself that you was a mom.**

** But how dare you try to take what you didn't help me to get. You selfish **

**bitch, I hope you fuckin' burn in hell for this shit.**

** Remember when Ronnie died and you said you wished it was me? **

**Well, guess what, I am dead. Dead to you as can be.**

**I'm sorry, Mama. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you **

**cry, but tonight I'm cleanin' out my closet.**

**I'm sorry, Mama. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you **

**cry, but tonight I'm cleanin' out my closet.**

Mrs. Blumburg still held onto the belief that she was right in raising him the way that she did and that it was time for Mikey to come to terms with his past and accept things the way they were. Mikey had screamed at her to leave, telling her that he was dead to her and she to him, just like she had said when he had gone to jail for the first time. He knew he had hurt his mother, but she had to realize that it was her fault that his life turned out the way it did and she would have to pay the ultimate sacrifice----losing him forever.

A/N: ok I know that was odd, but the idea was bothering me all day and I had to let it out! I hope you like it despite the out of character-ness and angst. Please r/r but remember the golden rule while doing so! Happy reading!


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